This week, it’s been a year since I came to WayFM!!

Here I am on my first day: 

My wife's family has a tradition of having the kids take their picture with their hands on the door on the first day of school. We did it with our daughter and I did it on my first day at WayFM! :) No one was around to take my picture so selfie.

When you take a new job, you want to be able to brag about how amazing your new gig is. Here’s some good news: it really is great. I like WayFM. Wally and Betty and Joy are just as fun as you think they are. The artists, the music, and YOU have made it something that I’m excited to be a part of. 

Anyone else feel the big “but” about to drop?

BUT…

 

Completely up-ending your life is not easy. Moving here and taking this new job has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. My wife and I left a church community that we adored. (We were even staff members!) We sold the house we have spent the last 20 years in. (We raised our daughter there!) We left family, friends, and a really delicious pizza place. And we miss it. 

We REALLY miss it.

The other thing I miss? Feeling safe. 

What I do mean by feeling safe? “Not-afraid-of-lions-eating-you”? Comfortable? 

It’s a little hard to put my finger on but I remember a moment: I was sitting in my office at home and I was praying through the opportunity of coming to WayFM. I had been work-from-home for almost four years and I had grown to love my home-studio. I distinctly remember looking out my office door and realizing that coming to WayFM meant leaving my home. That thought brought a sense of dread and then another little sentence popped into my brain: “I feel safe here.” 

That sense of safety meant a lot to me. I had a great deal of chaos in the formative years of my life. I didn’t realize how much I had been chasing a sense of safety and belonging until it was time to give it up. 

I went on a prayer retreat to pray and think through the idea of coming to WayFM. Was I willing to give up my safety and comfort to do something new and different? What a simple sentence for something so overwhelming and complex. 

Both options seemed silly:

Leave everyone and everything I know? Absurd! 

Stay here and just do the same thing for the rest of my life until I die? Absurd! 

 It became clear to me that the real hurdle of it all was safety. I felt safe in my house. It is full of wonderful memories. (I still miss it.) I felt safe in my neighborhood. It was full of people I went to church with. If I needed help or someone to talk to, they were just down the street. It wasn’t perfect (community never is) but it was wonderful. 

When it came down to it, I had to leave. It’s hard to explain. God didn’t say: “YOU MUST DO THIS” but it was so plain to us that becoming part of WayFM was the right decision. 

What do you do when your safety and comfort has been ripped away? 

 

You cry a lot. :) 

 

No, seriously. You do. 

 

The loneliness. The fear. The overwhelming desire for something familiar. (Believe it or not, Texas Roadhouse is a great place for that. They all look the same.) 

At first, you look for something to just numb the pain. Then you realize you have to start replacing the old things with new things and that is where I have found myself over the last few weeks. The temptation is to attempt to just rebuild everything the way that it was. Can I find a new church just like my old church? Can I put together a room in my house that’s just like my old office? 

To borrow a recent phrase: Maybe this time I should “build back better”. 

Can I find safety and comfort in something that doesn’t change? 

 

The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior;

    my God is my rock, in whom I find protection.

He is my shield, the power that saves me,

    and my place of safety.

 

That’s Psalm 18 verse 2. 

Look at those words: rock… fortress… shield… safety. 

David knew all about change. He started as a brave shepherd who killed a giant. This propelled him to the palace and fame. Too much fame. He eventually found himself back in the fields being hunted by a jealous King Saul. HIs story goes on but this Psalm was written about his time being hunted (and, if you keep reading, the victory God gave him). 

David needed a place he could hide in the middle of terrible circumstances. His life had been completely up-ended and he wanted safety. Where did he find it? The Lord.

The Lord was his “place of safety”. 

If the Lord could be that for David, maybe He could be that for us, too. 

Do I believe it? Yep. Have I achieved it? Nope. 

I wish that it was as easy as reading the Bible and then instantly “getting” it, throwing a spiritual switch that fixes everything. What I’m finding is that the safety I’m looking for in Jesus is a gradual process of turning to Him in those moments when I need safety. Not looking to numb myself with distractions but turning to Him with my pain and fear and sitting with Him in it all. 

God was David’s safe place. He’s becoming my safe place. He can be yours, too.